sushi train

the australians call them sushi trains. it's those restaurants that have the conveyer belt moving around with little plates of sushi on them. i went to one the other day; it was my first time. i have some advice for anyone thinking about going any time soon.

first of all, the sushi train never stops. it is one way ticket to pisces hell. the raw fish never stops moving. this has 2 effects. one: is the need to make snap decisions. if it looks good, take it. if you think for too long (2 seconds is too long) then the chance is gone, as it is too impolite to lean over other dinners to grab your long past chosen plate. also, if you touch a plate, you have to take it. once you touch, it is yours. no changing your mind, or swapping the order. you are stuck with the shrimp head my friend. two: motion sickness. the table moves in front of you. the plates are constantly sailing away and towards you. be careful when you stand.

next is you need a good memory. as you sit on the platform, watching the sushi train, you see the same things whizz past; then 10 minutes later; you see the same thing whizz past again; and then again; and again... i was in there for about an hour and saw the same dead crab crawl in front of my eyes over and over again, and i began to wonder how long it was going to keep on jogging around and around and around. seafood kept at room temperature for over an hour or longer is obviously not a good idea unless you want to lose a lot of weigh very quickly.

finally is you have to suppress your natural instinct to assume this is an all you can eat restaurant. yes, the food is endless, and yes you don't have to order, just like all the best buffet in the world: but you do have to remember is the happy waiter will count all your plates and total up the bill. the different colour plates represent different prices.

now you have a ticket to ride.


football: euro 2004

france are a bunch of smug fuckers, the swiss are chocolate eating army knife monkeys and the croatians better roll over tonight.


typhoo

typhoon hit japan today. the trains delayed. i was tired so fell asleep, headbutting the person sitting next to me. he didn't look too zen.


listening

the streets. he is great. lights are blinding my eyes; people pushing by; disappearing into the night. i heard a richmond fontaine song. it was great too.

tsumago and magome

2 weeks ago i went on a hike through gifu. it was along the old road from kyoto to tokyo called (i think) the nagasendo highway. it was between these 2 towns tsumago and magome. along the way i saw many trees and roads, cars and caterpillars. there were also 2 waterfalls. it's the first natural waterfall i have ever seen. it gives off the impression of energy and strength. the rushing water creates a fine cool mist and light breeze. in tsumago i ate horse sashimi, which if you can't guess, is raw horse meat. it was ok. i also saw caramelized grasshoppers in the gift store. i can eat raw horse and half cooked fish guts, but i don't like the idea of insects. give me an octopus eyeball anyday.

the town of tsumago is old and preserved. i read in the leaflet that all modern things were removed from the town: tv aerial and pylons, stuff like that. what they forget to add is that a heavy grey tarmac (asphalt to you american readers) road has been laid between the rustic houses and genuine shops. it is still beautiful, as was magome. i can't really describe them and give them justice, so just ask me to show you the pictures. it was a bit like the last samurai, but real enough to touch and old enough to breath.


reading

read 2 self help kinda books. they aren't as bad as you think they are. still reading don quioxte. it is still very funny.


shanghi knights

i saw this yesterday. this is what happens in every fish out of water movie set in england. laugh at the accent. laugh at driving on the other side of the road. laugh at stiff upper lip. laugh at spotted dick. laugh at haggis. laugh at stonehenge. laugh at beefeaters. laugh at queen. laugh at weather. also see: king ralph, european vacation, three men and a little lady...


dead presidents

so, that guy that used to be on spitting image has died. i have nothing to say as i don't know anything about him: that's all.


cd

i bought a leadbelly cd. it is good. it sounds like he's singing in hues of brown in country towns.


K1

i watched K1 yesterday. it's a bit like kickboxing. it is massive over here, and extremely violent. real blows and real blood and brusies. each bout only lasts 3 rounds so they often go hell for leather; and it ain't no ultimate fighting bullshit either: no lying on the ground and wrestling, it's all elbows and knees. if you fall over, get up and a fight on.

hong kong

i'm back from hong kong and it never ceases to amaze me how scary old people are.

during my stay in hong kong i helped some elderly relatives look at old people's home for them. they live at the very edge of hong kong, in an area called sha tau kok. it is at the border of china, and special permits must be obtained to even enter there. the town is guarded with a gate and 15 foot high barbed wire fence. the army officers never smile as they check your papers. sha tau kok is rural and surrounded by mountains. the buildings are concrete and crumbling, all stained by leaking air con units. my parents pointed out to me a pink block of flats, with brown rusting drain pipes and cracked tiles. the ramp into the building was worn and falling apart. they told me it was only 2 years old.

sha tau kok has 2 old people's homes. they are nearly identical in design. they have wide open plan floors; with cubicles instead of rooms. the barrier separating each sleeping area is no more that 3 feet high. when you sit on your bed, you can see everyone else in the home. mounted on the walls are huge electrical fans, whirring and swing left; then right; then left; then right... middle aged nurses strut around in dirty white uniforms, speaking in parental tones to old people, then smiling to us when they don't understand.

they people in here are old. when chinese people are young, they look young. when chinese people are middle aged, they look young. when chinese people are old, they look ancient. the face creases up and sags. liver spots appear like acne on a teenager. i saw someone that was so thin, his hip bone was nearly poking out of his skin. another was looked like as shrunken prune, a miniature dried version of his former self. others stared as we walked in, and a few shuffled towards us. they were so soft and fragile, as if i could crack their skulls just by pressing my finger on their foreheads and feel their mushy brains.

the eventuality of my fate is made flesh: my mortal self is looking me in the eye. the woman who couldn't stop nodding her head asked me we i was from. i saw a picture of a young man in a mortar board and gown next to her bed. 2 friends rose from their chairs, and one helped the other walk to his bed; physically supporting him though he could hardly move himself. another shriveled grandma spoke to me like an excited school girl at christmas: her voice betraying her age. i estimated about 40 people must have lived there with an average age of 70. that is 2800 years in total. they have lived my life more than 100 times over.

i left that place thinking about humanity in unlikely forms and that people must die all the time.


new york trilogy - auster

as promised, some views on this book. the first story was interesting, then gets a bit weird at the end. the second story is an exercise in cleverness. the third links everything together. i liked the overlapping and how one event inspires events in another story. it shows the creative process; the speculation and fantasy.

remember john rabe

i also finished the rape of nanking by iris chang. the book is as horrific as the title suggests and the events in nanking even more so. it shows not all nazis are the same too.

now

i've just started don quixote by cervantes. i can't believe this book has already made me laugh out loud.

hurry hurry

i have to leave for the train to work in about 20 minutes, so the following words will be more hurried and mispelt than ever before; not that i really give a shit.

hong kong

my parents want me to go to hong kong: as they will be there too. i will be going on wednesday and returning on sunday. life makes such demands on me; and only a wanker, such as I, can make glib comments like this about a free plane ticket.

snows of kilimanjaro

finished new york trilogy by paul auster. i quite liked it. i'll tell you why next time. i read some short stories by hemmingway. goddam he was one good short story writer and snows of kilimanjaro is an outstanding piece of work. every would-be, wannabe writer should read it and read it again, and then read it repeatedly forever just to know how lucky they are not to have a gammy leg in the middle of south africa and be brimming with stories.

bootleg mood

after buying dylan's newly released bootleg, i was in a bootleg mood and bought let it be... naked by the beatles. i know it's a different kettle of drums, but i thought it was ok, not fab.

time is nearly up...

saw kill bill vol2. it is better than the first one. how the hell does she punch her way through 6 feet of soil? i loved dayrl hanna: what a bitch, and what a scrap in budd's trailer. i loved the finale: the story is so much more interesting than another grand duel at sunrise. what a clever man QT is.

bob save me

i bought bob dylan's new album last wednesday. i say new album, but of course it's part of the bootleg series, which also spawned live 66, reguarded by every living person as the greatest live album in the history of music making.

the new double cd was recorded way back in 1964. in new york when dylan was only 23. he wrote mr tambourine man and hard rain and sang gates of eden when he was only 23. what did you do when you were 23?

before i go on, i'd just like to say that i'm not a music journalist, and i have no idea how to write a cd review. i'll leave that to the bangs, marcus's and bjortomts of this world. i will just say that listening to the cd is like falling in love again. i especially like who killed davey moore; a song in which dylan sounds like he's going to stretch his voice until it snaps. he doesn't sing "moore". he sings "moorewa". he fills the song with life and tops it up with soul. in this cd you also have dylan laughing and talking with his audience. he is having fun and giggling like a little girl.

i think it's his vunerability that is the best aspect of this live album. there isn't the defensiveness of this electric tour, or the dogmatic rants of his christian phase nor the solemnity of his never ending tour. what we have is a mere man, laughing singing swinging madly across on stage. wonderful wonderful wonderful.


shaolin soccor

a movie has just been released in america called shaolin soccor. i saw that movie on video about 4 years about at home, and it was on tv last week in japan. it has a guy called stephen chow in it. i love that guy.


bookie

there was a book sale last week. i bought short stories by hemmingway, gangs of new york by ashbury, sons and lovers by lawrence and double trouble by greil marcus. two pound sixty a book. bargin.

scabe

scabe (pronunced skay bay) is japanese for pervert. i'm in a manga cafe at the moment, using the internet facility. the place is pretty crowded, and there are some scabes in here. there's nothing like emailing your mum when the guy next to you is looking a hardcore school girl pics is there? i ain't an expert, but that don't look very educational to me.

hostages

just less than one hour ago i was still in a noddle bar in nagoya. i was chowing down on a bowl of pork ramen, sitting at a long wooden bar, having just bought my meal ticket at the shiny machine in the corner. the place is rather narrow; there really are no tables in this restaurant, just a bar and stools. no waiters or waiteresses, just bar staff. today is raining, so the place is dark and gloomy. in the corner glows a small portable tv. JNN is on. i'm not sure what JNN stands for, but maybe Japan News Network, as all i can see on tv are pictures of desert, soliders, anchor men, corespondants and hostages. The place is empty apart from a family quietly chatting down the other end of the bar. Mother, father and daughter.

the only thing on the news recently are the 3 japanese civilians been held in iraq. all we can hear now is hostages, hostages, hostages. the mutilated americans, the seven chinese, 3 italians, czechs, etc... also death tolls, soliders and bush.

as i sat eating i thought about the anti war demo: was it really a year ago we walked from embankment to hyde park? my life has certainly changed a lot since then, have my views? no.

of course you can't give in to terrorists or kiddnappers. i have no answers really. a lot of people here are blaming bush. they say he made japan change their pacifist constitution and dragged them into war. i don't subscribe to bush being satan, or any of that crap. i just think he's a bit of a moron, with dangerous views. having him control millions of soliders makes people nervous.


cherry blossoms (slight return)

as fast as they come, they go. the cherry blossoms last around two week: shyly open the door, strut around bold as brass, then die. the speed of blooming to dying is remarkable. full bloom only lasts a day or two before the petals fall creating a cherry blossom storm then the thick pink trees turn fresh green.

the japanese really like cherry blossoms. they say they reflect the ephemeral nature of life, the whimsical universe, the brevitiy of ourselves. they come into our field of vision. first: just a tiny blushing buds on heavy dark branches, just enough to catch your eye. a few days later they bloom, not all at once; the early flowers poke their heads out into the spring wind, before their friends join them, rushing into the party. the sun shines brightly, white and endless for a few hours. it is vast and infinite. then they fall. the petals, in the prime of colour, float and drift away; across the sky. you blink and they are going. the lush flowers are slowly disappearing. blink again and they have gone for good; never to be seen again. the branches are new green. there is a void where the posies used to be, and nothing exists except spring.

read

i read eats, shoots and leaves by someone truss. it's a book about grammar: about how to use colons; semi colons, commas and full stops. after reading that book i realised something: no one has ever taught me how to use a colon or semi colon before. they were a complete mystery to me: a total black spot in my knowledge. now i know; i feel much better, more comfortable with my role as a speaker and user of the english language.

still reading ghosts by auster.

cherry blossoms

i hear the cherry blossoms are at 80% blooming rate. i saw many pissed up people at tsuramai park: rowdy and stumbling about. reminds me of nights out in the west end.

movies

i saw kissing jessica stein a few days back; it was pretty good. good dialoge and simple direction but very middle class though and wanky in an undefinable way. still, it was funny. also saw a movie called blue crush about surfing. it made it quite clear that on the eve of my 25th year on the planet, that i; myself being me, will never become a surfer. never.

25

i am 25 now: an old bastard. kurt cobain killed himself when he was 27. i still have 2 years left then. i recently started thinking that the reason he is so popular is that his surname sounds like cocaine. i'm gonna call my kid jack cannacis. or jimmy asperin.

A4

i recently found out that A4 pads are really difficult to find in convienice stores. B5 seems to be the popular choice here. interesting isn't it?

insects

i found a cockroach in my toliet the other day. i killed it. it was my first time to kill a cockroach. it was disgusting. they ooze out a clear sticky slim as you squash them, just like in the movies. they crack and yell as you crush their hard red bodies and struggle to escape. finally they pop; are still; then legs just fold up.

i'm going to buy aerosol from now on.


(ps. i've recently discovered the apostrophe is shift 7 in japan: not in the usual place near the enter key. bloody inconvient if you ask me)